Coping With Vaginal Prolapse

Following the birth of my third child I went to lift my son 4yrs onto a sofa bed from the floor I felt something happen down below, when I went to the toilet I felt different and realised I had developed a prolapse. It happened about 6-8 weeks after my baby’s birth, I had a normal delivery following a previous caesarian birth.

I did mention to my obstetrician that I had some concerns about my pelvic floors and wondered if I should have another caesarian, but she said if i have already had a natural birth with my first child that the damage to that area was already done and that another vaginal birth wont make any difference. Unfortunately if she had told me about the strong possiblity that i may have a prolapse i would have opted for another caesar. I however thought that as I had 2 other children to care for that my recovery rate would be better if I went natural and that is how my obstetrican was also leaning.

So here I am at 39 with a vaginal prolapse I dont know what course of action to take. i went to a physio and she tested my pelvic floor muscles which were very weak, i might also add i did have a very difficult birth which was extremely painful. after I had my daughter I knew I had made a mistake about the vaginal birth. I did buy a machine to stimulate the pelvic floor muscles and havent used it as much as I would like to due to being a very busy mum to 3 children 6 and under.

I avoid sexual intercourse with my husband, not that he says he can feel it, but it feels as though I have a balloon inside and that something is hitting it. There is no enjoyment there and sex feels very different, I do feel as though I have altered body image and feel as if no man would want me anymore. I dont feel whole anymore and it is very upsetting, I try not to let it bother me too much but if I do too much which is nearly everyday it does start to come down even more and become uncomfortable.

If I dont empty my bowels properly and I have trouble there too, it takes me twice as long to go because I feel as though I have a kink or a bulge in the bowel where things have trouble getting around and I guess I dont make the time to go when I should because there is always something to do and then I get constipated. If I get constipated my prolapse comes down even more, very scarey and that can be frightening because you think everything will end up coming down.

Yes life is different. I feel as though even going for a walk is uncomfortable. I feel achy down there and this sense of a dragging feeling. I am aware of it almost 100% of the day, on a few good days when i havent done as much it goes quite a way up and I felt like i am half normal again and that feels great. I dont think I will ever be normal again and that i will have to live the rest of my life with this problem. Surgery may be an option when i stop lifting children but even that is not a guarantee that it wont come down again and there is problems associated with having surgery such as urinary problems, shrinkage of scar tissue and problems with intercourse associated with it.

I know that if i used my muscle stimulator that over time it will certainly help and that i have to be disciplined to do it and a little selfish and think of myself for a change and make the time because if I am happy so will the rest of the family be.

I hope the telling of my experience helps someone out there to not feel alone that there are other women out there who too are silently suffering with this problem. I wish you all the best and I hope you can find some help out there with this problem or some way of coping with it.